You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
at one point last night, you were literally auctioning me off. "reeeally drunk hot girl ! we'll start the bidding at an ice cold corona. oh, we have a bidder! do i hear a shot of whiskey? going once, going twice.."
youre welcome
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
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