margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
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