His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
made out with the bouncer to distract him from how illegitimate my fake id is.
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
As shirtless as possible
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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