in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
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