His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
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