I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
