BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
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