I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
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