IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
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