Whod you bang
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
they're like a gay fantastic four
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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