You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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