i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
Randomize
