Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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