Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Randomize
