I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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