scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
so let's talk penis.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
I feel like delivery guys should know that when you order lunch for one and answer the door wearing sweatpants, there's no need to say "Happy Valentine's Day."
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
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