I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
Randomize
