Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
