Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
Randomize
