your room smells of hookers.
And success
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
I supernannyed him into submission
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
Randomize
