I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
Randomize
