Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
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