dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
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