Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
Listen man, there's two things I know about in life: porn and sound. On a day that I'm wearing khakis, I need you to trust that I know what the fuck I'm doing.
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
