so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
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