It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
Randomize