She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
Randomize
