let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
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