Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
Get my husband this drunk again I will rip off your balls off with my bare hands and then cut them up with a dirty axe like fish bits. Do you understand me? DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?! See you at breakfast, FUCK FACE. I'll shove that bottle of Jamison so far up your ass you'll still be praying in 2020 you can take a shit! Seriously, you make it hard to be your best friend.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
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