I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
