I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
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