quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
Randomize
