He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
