Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
Everything about him screamed your future.
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
Randomize
