Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
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