The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
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