suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
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