we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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