Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
Randomize
