I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
I'm trying to think of how to explain to the dentist tomorrow that I think I pulled my jaw muscle eating pizza while drunk.
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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