We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
