Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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