I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
Randomize
