Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
did i just pee glitter
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Randomize
