All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
Randomize
