Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
She did NOT find it funny to come upstairs to find me with the word "MISERY" written on my forehead in magic marker and the label to the vodka bottle replaced with a scrap of paper taped around that says "COMPANY"
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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