but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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