i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
