either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
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