i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
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